A tribute to my second momma
In loving memory of a woman who made everyone feel seen, loved, and cherished. She was more than a mother-in-law; she was family, a guiding light, and a voice of unapologetic truth.
Making everyone feel like family
She possessed a rare gift for making everyone in her presence feel truly seen, loved, and cherished, instantly welcoming them into her heart as if they were family. Her warmth and genuine care radiated, creating a safe and loving space for all. Yet, she was also wonderfully blunt, never sugar-coating the truth. She was, quite simply, my second momma, and her impact on my life is immeasurable.
Lessons in raw honesty
My mother-in-law truly believed in cutting through the noise. Her favorite lesson was direct: do it, or step aside—just don’t pretend you’re trying. It wasn’t always the prettiest advice, but it was profoundly honest. What stayed with me most was her unwavering insistence on being truthful with yourself first. No excuses, no convenient lies to soften reality. Know what you want, admit what you’re avoiding, and then act accordingly. This approach might not always be comfortable, but it keeps your life authentic and moving forward.
Embracing life, loss, and love
This journey has taught us that grief and joy can indeed coexist. We navigate life carrying both loss and cherished memories. Somewhere along the way, we remember that the best tribute to those we’ve loved and lost isn't solely to mourn, but to continue living fully—laughing, exploring, and loving the people who remain by our side. Life is short, strange, heartbreaking, beautiful, and far too precious to leave unlived.
I remember telling her once,
"Thank you for making him."
Not just for bringing him into this world,
but for all the pieces of yourself
you quietly tucked inside him along the way.
His kindness.
His strength.
His stubbornness when it matters.
His heart that loves fiercely,
even when life gives him every reason not to.
The way he shows up.
The way he protects.
The way he carries people he loves
as if putting them down was never an option.
I saw those things in him,
and I knew they had to come from somewhere.
They came from her.
And I thanked her,
because without those pieces of her,
I may never have found my soulmate,
my great love,
my safe place,
my forever home in another person.
The beautiful truth is that love does not leave when a person does.
It continues on
in the people they raised,
the lives they touched,
the lessons they taught without ever speaking them aloud.
Part of her journey lives on in him.
And because of that,
part of her love found its way to me.
For that,
I will be grateful for the rest of my life.
Thank you for him.
Thank you for the pieces of yourself
you left behind in the person I love most.
And thank you for reminding us all
that the people we love never truly leave us.
Sometimes,
they simply keep loving us
through the people who carry them forward.
"My mother-in-law left an indelible mark on every life she touched. Her legacy of love and fierce honesty lives on."
Adverse Cantos and Sages
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